Why I couldn’t Blog Anymore.

When your body just completely gives up on you to the extent that you think multiple times before getting up and dragging yourself to the washroom, your mind doesn’t particularly feel all that merry too. My health was pretty much at its worst. That’s how 2018 started for me. As happy as 2017 was, 2018 turned out to be the complete opposite. And if that wasn’t enough, I had to befriend death to free my baby boy of pain. I lost my dog, Mr. Doughnut, in Feb 2018. SO you know what I mean now. 

Even though Doughie left the biggest gift for me the same moment he left, I had a lot to deal with and figure out. It’s months later now and I continue dealing with and figuring out things. 

A few months after his passing away, I tried and also failed at creating content like I used to. I didn’t really feel like reading anything, didn’t feel like blogging. Even the series that so many of you enjoyed the most – Dear Diary – I couldn’t successfully return to. The days became utterly monotonous without him and so I didn’t have much to share in my virtual diary. 
Eventually, I decided to let go of that. I tried to continue reading the book I left in between when Doughnut got sick and I realise now that I shouldn’t have put myself through it. I’m not someone who is comfortable with or someone who accepts the concept of death that easy, having someone around you one moment and just gone the next. I can’t look at dead bodies and it’s just always painful thinking about losing someone. So do I get over loss easily? nope. And this loss has been the most painful. But I knew I’ve been gifted for a reason, and I knew I wouldn’t waste it. So I kept trying. 

I tried to get back to reading, It wasn’t the same at all and it still isn’t. I haven’t had a “connection” with a story till now no matter how much I liked it. This “connection” is what made it possible for me to have a train of thought worth and interesting enough to fill my Goodreads feed and this website with reviews. But there was this one book I read in Mid March and it instantly made me write a letter to the author. I haven’t mentioned this before, didn’t share it online too but I think I’d like to now. 

Please zoom in to read. 

This helped me consider reading again but even now, It’s just not the same. However, after even more trial and errors and re-trying to get back on Instagram and youtube, I think I’m finally going to now. I have all the tools ready and I think I just need to jump in without thinking too much. And who knows, maybe I’ll fall in love with books the way Doughnut helped me to. 

But there’s something else Doughie made me see and realise recently – my love for art and designing. I’d actually forgotten until one day when I was just missing him and crying that I think he somehow showed me the way – amidst crying I instantly had an idea about how I want my future to be like. I never thought I’d have the skill set to or that I could get better and more professional at it to be able to turn it into a career. And here we are now! After practicing and figuring out my next move, I finally decided to share my work professionally online and that’s how llGeeKayll came into being. I’m preparing myself to become a self-employed/freelance Artist, Illustrator and a Fashion Accessory Designer. And it goes without saying that I won’t be able to do this without your support. 

I’d like to make the effort – again – to get back to making content (both for the book and now art community) on Instagram, here and also back on YouTube. Many of you have been with me since I started blogging and you have absolutely no idea about how much I appreciate you for being there. I’ve been able to make some wonderful friends too! Apart from the fact that I’d love for you to stay in touch and check out my work online, engage and share – I’d actually like you to remind me of what made you come on this journey with me initially. I’d like to know what kind of content you’ve liked and what would you like to see from now on too. It’ll help me get back on track and feel better in doing everything again. 

You’ve been the most amazing group of people and supporters and I’d like to get back to where it all started ❤ 

Thank you for everything. I’d like to make Doughie happy and proud by making 2019 better and I’d love for you to be a part as usual. 

Thank you for dropping by.

Love,
Gee. 

Baby Boy ❤

Find me elsewhere:

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/timesofgee/
Instagram (Art & Design): https://www.instagram.com/llgeekayll/
Goodreads: https://www.goodreads.com/TimesofGee
Twitter: https://twitter.com/gurveen94
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TimesofGee/
Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/TimesofGee


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14 thoughts on “Why I couldn’t Blog Anymore.

  1. I’m so proud of you. Though I haven’t met you in person this blog post shows how much you’ve achieved. I’m sure Doughnut will be super happy & proud! He’s gonna be there for you always♥️ Dogs teach us unconditional love, and I believe they make our lives whole.
    I’m waiting for your YouTube videos 😁 Loads of love!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you so much Ashwini!! You’ve been a constant support and such a delight to have conversations with!! Can’t wait to buddy read books with you again ♥

      Like

  2. This blog made me a bit emotional. My dog passed away in May this year and even I went through the same pain. I still remember when he was taking his last breath, I was sitting beside him, cross-legged, crying constantly and praying Lord to not put him in much pain. I count that day as the darkest day of my life.
    He taught me to stay happy in my own company and I feel it’s worth learning. Really, dogs are love. They are the best teacher.
    Thanks for sharing, Gee! You are making Doughie proud.
    Stay healthy, stay fit, stay happy. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I’m sorry to hear that and I know exactly what you mean.
      It’s definitely worth learning, it’s something that’s brought me this far in life too. Dogs and animals are someone humans may never understand. You know I’m a vegan now, right? I just could not not be 🙂

      Thank you for dropping by and reading it, I appreciate it.

      Liked by 1 person

  3. Glad to see you getting back to things you love. The best way for you to remember Doughie is by doing the things he taught you to love. Doughie’s passing is actually why I started following your blog. I saw one of your posts when we were struggling with the decision of putting the dog I grew up with down. My heart went out to you and you had summed up the pain of losing a doggers so truthfully that I realized I had to follow you. I have enjoyed reading your posts on color and your inktober. Keep trucking and stay positive knowing so many people support you!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. It’s true, I couldn’t think of anything else but to do those things. Helps me feel closer to him now.
      I’m sorry you had to go through that pain, I know how unbearable it can be. Thank you so much for reaching out, this is really kind of you ♥ I truly am lucky to have you all here with me.

      Liked by 1 person

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